ManFAQ Friday: Of Men and Pigs
It’s Friday, and that means answer time! For those of you who have commented with questions from previous ManFAQs, thank you. I’m adding yours to the list of questions women have asked about men over the years, and I will answer them all in turn – to continue to demystify the more malodorous gender for those of the gentler. Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man. What could go wrong?
Question: What is it with you guys and bacon?
Answer: I’ll confess I was going to write something with great righteous indignation, along the lines of “Oh yeah? Well, what is it with you ladies and purses?” Then I remembered… the bacon weave.
I may have to go with righteous indigestion on this one.
We know from holy scripture that “There are no two finer words in the English language than ‘Encased Meats,’ my friend.” (Hot Doug, Letters to the Chicagoans, $3.16.) And we know, because I’ve told you before, that pig is yummy – it’s a good reason to go to Alabama, for instance. So, yes, I have been known to stock up on bacon. And by stock up, I mean walking into a butcher shop and walking out with 40 pounds of it.
It’s not just meat! It’s thick, juicy meat, with nice smoky flavor, and it will take whatever you do to it – brown sugar, cayenne pepper, you name it. Bacon is life. So, men are pigs, men eat pigs, men love pigs – it all makes sense. You know, somewhere.
Now you know. Please, feel free to comment! Also, forward any questions you’d like answered to BUMD – at – biguglymandoll.com!
Oh noes, we’re back to being cannibals, again? And not even of the fine and young variety?
Then again, a possible reason folks dig bacon could be due to the (possible) number of different textures and tastes within a single item: crunchy, chewy, salty and sweet at the same go.
Maybe something about, “Animal Farm?”
FYC FTW! “Pig thing!” And yes, we’re totally cannibals. Men are pigs.
Hmm, two legs bad, four legs dinner….