Monday ManFAQ

A long time ago, before many people were even thinking about quarantine, or impeachment, or how long it had been since they’d last showered, Friday meant answer time at the ManFAQ. People, and by people I mean women, would send me questions, and as part of my parole agreement a public service I answered them, to help demystify the more malodorous gender for those of the gentler.

This went on for about a year and a half, and I thought I’d answered all the questions.

Today, though, is different. Today, a new question has come up. And as usual, I do mean UP. So here we go again, by request, actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man. What could go wrong?

Question:   Do all of our not-sexy pajamas vs sexy pajamas choices even make a difference in the level of the hard sell… or do men not even notice the difference?

Answer:    I will tell you a story. To protect the guilty, I will change the names. My friend, who is certainly not named Greg, went a-travelling some years ago, with a co-worker (whose name is no more germane to our story than Greg’s is, but it’s more fun quoting Greg). I will add that Greg is, or anyway was at the time, a suave and good looking guy, worldly, morally upstanding, and righteous before the lord. You know the kind I mean. His co-worker was a brilliant woman, a leader as well as a funny and kind person. She also happened to be very attractive. She also happened to be married, a condition that did not at the time plague our man Greg.

It turned out that she also happened to be horny, a condition which with our Greg was afflicted reasonably often, being as how he’s a guy. (I feel that I can say with some degree of certainly that he’s still afflicted with this condition reasonably often, since he’s still breathing.) Long story short, she entered his hotel room to talk about the meeting they had the next day, and she put the question of Hey Hey to him.

He said no.

She said OK, and stepped into the bathroom to fix her makeup, leaving the door open.

Being a man for whom words were in no short supply, he expounded on his answer very eloquently, so as not to hurt her feelings, with great tenderness, and in the spirit of friendship, and loyalty, with a discussion of their workplace relationship, and of her husband, known to our man Greg, and of her many wonderful qualities as a co-worker and a friend.

When he wound down from his prolixity, she stepped out of the bathroom, without a word. She was wearing, as you say, sexy PJs.

She looked at him.

“Did you hear all of what I just said?” asked Greg.


“Yeah, never mind. And Take. That. Off.”

Now you know – we notice. We ALWAYS notice. We might not always engage, but we really do notice!

Please, feel free to comment! Also, forward any questions you’d like answered to BUMD – at –!

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