This whole ‘getting up in the morning’ thing is starting to kill my mojo.   

What with the pope in town and all…

I think it’s time for me to come forward with this.  I was emotionally traumatized by Jamie Gibson, Jessica Gibson’s half-sister, before she started working for Rob Lowe.  This was a difficult time in my past, but I need people to know the truth: The Gibson girls played me for a sucker, and now they’re […]

Mojo in the Morning

It was 7:45 on a sunny Sunday morning, and Don Henley had to die.  By the time the coffee was ready, Debbie Gibson was pregnant with my two-headed love child.  By 8:30, breakfast was on the table, my girlfriend was in a coma, and we were doing Jello shots with Jesus.  Life is good.