ManFAQ Friday: You Wouldn’t Understand

It’s Friday, and that means answer time! For those of you who have commented with questions from previous ManFAQs, thank you. I’m adding yours to the list of questions women have asked about men over the years, and I will answer them all in turn – to continue to demystify the more malodorous gender for those of the gentler.  Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man. What could go wrong?

Question:   I keep hearing people say, “It’s a guy thing.”  What, exactly, constitutes a guy thing?

Answer:    I could tell you, but it’s a guy thing.  No no, OK, I’m kidding.  Guy things are usually things we assume you won’t like, won’t really approve of, or that we really don’t want to have to admit to you.  For example if you have more than one guy at a table, in public, and they’re watching people walk by, they will, eventually, start discussing the desirability of – and likelihood of Hey Hey with – each woman walking by.  When you walk up and ask them what they’re talking about, they will respond, in near unison: “Football.”

It’s a guy thing.

Here’s another example. Yesterday a nice couple came over and bought some furniture SOBUMD was selling on Craigslist (and yes, I wrote the ad copy). They paid cash, still legal tender for many things, and the husband had a bank envelope with twelve $100 dollar bills. I’m certain his wife had told him to go to the bank and get $1200 bucks. When they left, I noticed the envelope from the bank said “Kevin, $1240”.

That’s a guy thing.

Belching, farting, obnoxious smells, football and beer and scratching themselves in public – guy things. And if you’re thinking to yourself, wait, but I do those things! – then let me assure you that guy things are not always limited by gender. You might just be one of the guys.

After all, it’s a guy thing.


Now you know. Please, feel free to comment! Also, forward any questions you’d like answered to BUMD – at –!


3 Responses to “ManFAQ Friday: You Wouldn’t Understand”

  1. I’m one of the guys most of the time, but here’s a guy thing that maybe you can explain in a future post: the ability to instantly reclassify the merit of an object. To wit:

    Hubby: “I need a new putter. This one is a piece of shit. It never hits straight, the grip’s crap, the balance is all wrong, and it’s scuffed up.” *buys new putter*

    Me: “I need a new putter…”

    Hubby: “Here, take my old one. It’s a great putter!”

    Me: “…?”

  2. I know quite a number of women who are more “one of the guys” than many men.

  3. […] You can always tell a Real Man – he’s using the men’s room.  After all, it’s a guy thing. […]

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