ManFAQ Friday: The Bond That Binds

It’s Friday, and that means answer time! For those of you who have commented with questions from previous ManFAQs, thank you. I’m adding yours to the list of questions women have asked about men over the years, and I will answer them all in turn – to continue to demystify the more malodorous gender for those of the gentler. Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man. What could go wrong?

Question:   What’s the deal with this male bonding business?

Answer:   Male bonding is a euphemism for spending time in a “safe” area, by which we mean a time and place where none of our bad habits will negatively impact our chances of Hey Hey later, yet still allow for some kind of social interaction.  We tend to pass stories, drinks, and gas while lying about how brave we are, how virile we are, and how the Cubs are sure to win the series this year

It’s a chance to talk to others of our kind, either to solicit tips about Hey Hey from guys who may have had sex with actual women, or to check out the competition, in a friendly way.  And by friendly, I mean drinking.  And by check out, I mean finding out if you can drink more than that other guy. 

It’s a chance to do all those things that we imagine you don’t like, to be uncivilized, uncouth, and generally improper.  Mind you, there’s a very real possibility that you wouldn’t, couldn’t, and in fact don’t give any kind of a damn about any of those things we do, since many are biological and biology textbooks indicate that you do many of them yourself.  But we need to rebel against something, and we both know it’s not going to be you, so we take a little time-out from proper society and we rebel against that, for as long as we can.  You know, until we run out of beer.

Now you know.  Please, feel free to comment with any questions you’d like answered!

2 Responses to “ManFAQ Friday: The Bond That Binds”

  1. we have girl nights out for similar reasons

  2. Last time I mail bonded was the time I spilled crazy glue on the month’s bills.

    re: The Cubs
    I think you’ll have to wait another 98 years, maybe the lucky number is 200 not 100.

    By the way, check out (at your local library if you are too cheap to buy it) “Crazy ’08” by Cait Murphy. There you can revel in the good old (really old) days of the last Cubs World Series championship. Not often that I’ve found a readable sports book that’s footnoted.

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