Big Ugly Man Doll

It’s Friday, and that means answer time! For those of you who have commented with questions from previous ManFAQs, thank you. I’m adding yours to the list of questions women have asked about men over the years, and I will answer them all in turn – to continue to demystify the more malodorous gender for those of the gentler.  Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man. What could go wrong?

Question:   I know you’ve covered this before, but what is it about household chores?  Is there some kind of genetic thing that makes strong, athletic men fall asleep when the dishes are dirty?

Answer:    Do you know, I’m glad you asked.  In my capacity as the final arbiter of good taste, decency, and gender equality in this country, we’re screwed I was asked to comment on an article from Time magazine a few months ago about why “Men and Women Should End” what Time magazine would like us to call the “Chore Wars.”

Now, you’re welcome to refer to anything you like as a ‘war,’ but with our men and women in uniform getting shot at overseas, as the final arbiter of good taste, decency, and gender equality in this country, it is my professional opinion that Time magazine can go stuff itself with this headline.

That being said, Time is here telling us that “new research on working fathers indicates that they’re the ones experiencing the most pressure,”  and this time they have science on their side.  One researcher mentions, “We think men don’t do anything, but is that right? Are we systematically missing what they do do?” 

Yes.  Let’s face it, men have been systematically getting women to put up with their do-do for a long time.  It’s dollars to doughnuts that the study that says men do as much work around the house, or its equal in the office, was in fact run by men.   If you want him to clean it, hit him in the head with something.  Of course he’s tired.  We’re all tired.  You’re tired, aren’t you?  Nobody really wants to do the dishes and clean the floor, except for the Reigning Queen of Pink, and she has OCD.  (And no, we don’t rent her out – who would clean our floors?)

So, is it genetic?  No.  It’s science.  We’re really working very, very hard.  Please, try not to wake him – he’s probably just got his eyes closed because he’s thinking about the office, and needs to concentrate. 

Now you know. Please, feel free to comment! Also, forward any questions you’d like answered to BUMD – at – biguglymandoll.com!