Advent of Holiday Horror: Song 22
Yesterday’s advent post included a Unitarian joke. (Unitarian jokes, gotta love ’em!) Today, for about 15 minutes, there was a time when you could Google “Unitarian jokes” and find that Big Ugly Man Doll post as one of the top hits. Now, a few hours later, I’ve fallen out of the top hits again. I assume this is an example of God messing with me. Who would have guessed he was a Unitarian?
But this isn’t about that. This is an advent countdown of Christmas and other miscellaneous holiday songs that make me barf a bit, the ones you know, and you know you know them, and you know you’re supposed to love them, because they’re NICE and they’re CLASSIC and they’re MEANINGFUL – you know the kind I mean.
Today’s exercise in holiday tune torture comes to us from the one and only John Lennon. Imagine there’s no Yoko! But there is a Yoko. And she’s singing with him on this one, and if that’s not bad enough, they would like to wish you a Happy Christmas by showing you dead people, kids with guns, and amputees. Yes, there are bad things in the world. Yes, we’re all bastards, and war is evil. Happy Christmas, you should be ashamed and depressed. Like the holidays aren’t stressful and depressing on their own, we need this? I mean, kudos to John – it’s tough to really get people down with eight lines and a refrain, but he DOES it, by gum. “So, this is Christmas /you miserable shit. Why not take your money / and wallow in it.”
Go ahead. Rip your heart out watching sad, desperate people do sad, desperate things to each other, with bonus corpses for extra holiday cheer! I’ll be over here, figuring out how to get this Question Mark tree topper on the Christmas tree.
now see, i will disagree with you. this is the only lennon song that i love so much, i don’t even CARE that yoko is singing. in fact, i love imitating her when she sings: “a very merry christmaaaas….and a happy new yeaaaaaaar….etc”
i don’t like yoko. and yet, i love this.
please don’t attack my two favorite christmas songs or jesus will not get his wings. or something like that. my two faves:
“father christmas” by the kinks
and
“step into christmas” by elton john
there. you’ve been taunted.