How my children learned their ABCs
Posted on December 19th, 2007 by Big Ugly Man Doll
| A | Aaargh! Quiet back there! |
| B | Both of you, be quiet! |
| C | Christ, will you stop talking while I’m on the phone? |
| D | Damnit, I said be quiet! |
| E | Echoes are for canyons, which is where I’m going to throw you if you don’t stop talking! |
| F | For the love of God, shut up! |
| G | Goddammit, I thought I told you to be quiet! |
| H | How many times do I have to tell you to be quiet? |
| I | I’m sure I told you to be quiet! |
| J | Jesus! Shut! Up! |
| K | Kaconnannalaaaaaah! – stop it! Whichever one of you that is, just stop it! |
| L | La la la la la la! Not listening! |
| M | Mommy asked you to be quiet once. Mommy’s not going to ask again. Do I make myself clear? |
| N | Now would be a good time for you to exercise your quiet muscles. |
| O | Oh my God, if you don’t stop yelling I’m going to stop this car in the middle of this road and come back there and make you both very sorry! |
| P | Please please please, be quiet. |
| Q | Quiet! |
| R | Really, is it that hard to just sit quietly for One Damn Minute? |
| S | Shut up shut up shut up!!! |
| T | Talking. Don’t. |
| U | Unless you want to be grounded for the next 6 years, stay quiet. |
| V | Very. Quiet. Do you understand me? |
| W | Why can you not stay quiet? |
| X | Xtremely. As in quiet. |
| Y | You. Quiet. Now. |
| Z | Zoloft. Why do you ask? |
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