Big Ugly Man Doll

It’s Friday, and that means answer time! For those of you who have commented with questions from previous ManFAQs, thank you. I’m adding yours to the list of questions women have asked about men over the years, and I will answer them all in turn – to continue to demystify the more malodorous gender for those of the gentler.  Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man. What could go wrong?

Question:   Why on earth do you think it’s a good idea to take a picture of that?  Do you really think we want to see it?  Does Weiner have some kind of mental defect, or are you ALL like that?

Answer:   First, let me make two things perfectly clear:  Yes, he has a mental defect.  And yes, we’re all like that.  Look, there are a few things at play here – so to speak. 

First, the idea that you wouldn’t want to look at it doesn’t occur to us – Hey, Look What I Made!  We’re excited, we think you should be excited too – he made that thing himself, you know.  Or at least we hope he did, if he’s sending you the gift of GIF. 

Second, he thinks it’s pretty.  Remember that he’s had it forever, and it’s the only thing that he’s always been able to count on to make him happy and feel good – of course it’s beautiful to him.  It’s the prettiest thing in the world.  (This is also the main attraction of Point of View porn, but that’s another post.)  So yes, he does think you want to see it. 

And last, you know that he wants you to see it so you’re thinking about Hey Hey.  I’ll confess, we don’t ALL think sending the Polaroid of the Pole is the best opening line – sometimes a simple pubic hair on a can of Coke will do – but you ARE thinking about it, aren’t you?

Momma, don’t take my Kodachrome away!

Now you know.  Please, feel free to comment!  Also, forward any questions you’d like answered to BUMD – at – biguglymandoll.com!

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