I dont know nothin bout birthin no Barbies!

I feel like I’m going to give birth.

ManFAQ Friday: Ready, Normal People?

Why porn? And why are your attempts to hide it so pathetic? Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man. What could go wrong? Masturbation is cheap, clean, convenient, and free of any possibility of wrongdoing – and you don’t have to go home in the cold. But it’s lonely.

Good ole Jules

Jules Verne predicted the future, from submersible ships to space flight, including the concept of mutually assured destruction as a deterrent to war, high-speed trains, calculators, a worldwide “telegraphic” communications network that sounds suspiciously like the Internet, and the idea that governments would execute criminals by electric charge. That was a hell of a leap in 1863.

Also, because you cry.

I’m not an alcoholic – alcoholics go to meetings!

Did he know?

Here Kipling sits down with, talks to, asks impertinant questions of, and fawns over Mark Twain – who puts up with him, and admits that he has actually heard of him. Here, on the other side of the world, Kipling visits a Burmese town called Moulmein and sees a beautiful pagoda. I’m reading this and humming “Road to Mandalay” and realizing he hadn’t written it yet.