Do you remember fractions? You know, seven eighths, two hundred forty-seven three hundred twenty ninths? A third? Do you remember what a pain in the butt that was? No? Me either. The joy of having kids is that you get to revisit ALL your childhood, not just the good parts. Not that the diapers were such a joy, but at least I could speak with some authority. “That’s poo.” (I know poo when I see it.)
The idea that you could just hand me the tooth and I’d give you a buck *never* crossed your mind, did it? You’re far too wise to believe in anything as silly as the Tooth Fairy. But that molar’s still under your pillow. And I’m still going to wait until you’re sleeping, my little scientist.
Farewell, Zero the Hero. Nothing won’t be the same without you.
OK kid. Turn your damn lights on if you’re reading, your eyes are bad enough already. Don’t stay up too late, and don’t make any noise. Daddy needs plausible deniability, OK? “OK Daddy!” And we just don’t talk about why all my kids could define “plausible deniability” before they could write their names.
Putting the younger two to bed last night, there was a discussion of toys lost and then found. The RQoP began singing “The Toys are Back” to the tune of High School Musical 3’s “The Boys are Back”. Number One Son looked at her and said “Yeah, that’s just like…” and then proceed to sing […]