{"id":3549,"date":"2013-03-01T22:52:59","date_gmt":"2013-03-02T03:52:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/?p=3549"},"modified":"2013-03-01T22:52:59","modified_gmt":"2013-03-02T03:52:59","slug":"manfaq-friday-tequilibido","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/?p=3549","title":{"rendered":"ManFAQ Friday: Tequilibido"},"content":{"rendered":"

Here we are, another Friday, and\u00a0it’s answer time at the ManFAQ<\/a>.\u00a0\u00a0Once again\u00a0I don my manly mantle as Sage of the Sexes, helping demystify the more malodorous gender for those of the gentler, as we add to the list of questions women have asked about men over the years.\u00a0\u00a0Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man.<\/p>\n

What could go wrong?<\/p>\n

\n

Question:\u00a0<\/strong> Why does he always seem to think he wants a little Hey Hey after he’s been drinking?\u00a0 He can’t actually<\/em> do<\/strong> anything in that condition – why does he want to try<\/em>?\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

Answer:<\/strong>\u00a0 Here I have to coin a new term for you.\u00a0 Welcome to what we shall call a man’s tequilibido.<\/p>\n

His tequilibido is usually a function of how much he’s had to drink, how long it’s been since he last had sex (if he’s over 25), and what he usually thinks his chances are with you.\u00a0 (If he’s under 25, the question of how long it’s been since he last had sex is irrelevant if we’re working in time increments larger than “the last 15 minutes.”)\u00a0 Like they say south of the\u00a0border, “T\u00f3mame como al Tequila – de un golpe y sin pensarlo.”\u00a0 And, really, that’s about his level of thought after what he’s had to drink – “Hey, I got all the way here, we should totally celebrate that!\u00a0 With some good, life-affirming, baby-making sex!\u00a0 Yeah!”\u00a0 After all, he didn’t even get arrested on the way home, even though he probably should have been.\u00a0 He’s thinking it’s his lucky night!<\/p>\n

And he sounds sincere, doesn’t he?\u00a0 He really wants to, and he’s probably got your clothes off.\u00a0 Now he’s standing there, looking at you, and looking down, and wondering what the hell’s happened.\u00a0 He’s perplexed.\u00a0 Please, be gentle.\u00a0 If he’s over 25, this is about to be a rude awakening for him – because that’s really not going to work.\u00a0 Trust that it’s not you – you could be as hot as that girl you wished you looked like on the cover of last week’s magazine and those hydraulics still<\/strong> wouldn’t be working.\u00a0 Maybe you are<\/strong> as hot as that girl on the cover of last week’s magazine.\u00a0 It doesn’t matter.\u00a0 The Tequila is telling his brain “yes, now, here, her” and it’s telling his little buddy, “dude, once he’s asleep, let’s shave him! HAhahahaha!”<\/p>\n

He thinks it’s a great idea.\u00a0 He firmly believes it.\u00a0 And he’s going to do it again the next time, because he won’t remember tonight either.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\n

Now you know.\u00a0 Please, feel free to comment!\u00a0 Also, forward any questions you\u2019d like answered to BUMD \u2013 at \u2013 biguglymandoll.com!\u00a0 As always, your anonymity is guaranteed!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Why does he want sex after he’s been drinking enough that he can’t perform? The Sage of the Sexes, demystifying the more malodorous gender for those of the gentler. Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man. What could go wrong?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[41],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3549"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3549"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3549\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3560,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3549\/revisions\/3560"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3549"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3549"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3549"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}