{"id":2408,"date":"2012-01-20T11:45:52","date_gmt":"2012-01-20T15:45:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/?p=2408"},"modified":"2012-01-20T00:21:19","modified_gmt":"2012-01-20T04:21:19","slug":"your-weekly-walk-with-wisdom","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/?p=2408","title":{"rendered":"Your Weekly Walk With Wisdom"},"content":{"rendered":"

Here it is already Friday –\u00a0last week is over.\u00a0 Put it behind you.\u00a0 Breathe in, now out.\u00a0 Repeat.\u00a0 You’ve got a weekend to plan!\u00a0 Fridays around noon, assuming this server and I ever agree on what timezone we’re working with, you can catch up with your own personal astro-illogical future for the weekend and next week.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"Aries\"Aries (The Ram):<\/em>\u00a0 Next week, the levee will break.\u00a0 You will have no place to stay.\u00a0 You will be taught to weep and moan.\u00a0 Crying will not help you, and praying will not do you any good.\u00a0 You will have to move.\u00a0 I suggest considering a move to Chicago, or possibly Aberdeen, MD.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"Taurus\"Taurus (The Bull):<\/em>\u00a0 Good job sorting your clothes last week.\u00a0 This week, maybe you can tackle the dishes?\u00a0 Your kitchen is a mess, and your lucky number is zero.\u00a0 Hop to it!<\/p>\n

\"GeminiGemini (The Twins):\u00a0<\/em>\u00a0 You will be offered a hamburger on Wednesday.\u00a0 Hit it like the fist of an angry god, then pay for it Thursday.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"CancerCancer (The Crab):\u00a0<\/em> She likes you.\u00a0 She doesn’t want to sleep with you.\u00a0 Some people just aren’t going to want to do that, and you need to respect that.\u00a0 I know, you haven’t meet anyone yet who has wanted to do that, but they’re out there\u2026\u00a0 Somewhere\u2026\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"Leo\"Leo (The Lion):\u00a0<\/em> You’re having a bad hair week.\u00a0 It’s going to get worse before it gets better; don’t worry about it.\u00a0 This is a good week to warm up the bike – helmet hair isn’t an issue today.<\/p>\n

\"VirgoVirgo (The Virgin):\u00a0<\/em>\u00a0\u00a0Like a can of compressed gas, you’re waiting for something to blow.\u00a0 This week all hell will blow up, and you will wait no longer.\u00a0 Sunday, deals await you if you shop.\u00a0 Skip Thursday, it’s loaded with an extra helping of whoop-ass with your name all over it.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"Libra\"Libra (The Scale):\u00a0<\/em>\u00a0You’ve called your congressman twice this year; once more and the FBI will be knocking.\u00a0 You’re going to go downtown this week; don’t make it be the hard way.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"Scorpio\"Scorpio (The Scorpion):<\/em>\u00a0 Your suspicious nature causes you to be distrustful, but amidst all your evil character traits, you have grit and backbone.\u00a0 The Wisdom of the Serpent lies concealed within you, along with a lot of pizza and those cookies your roommates didn’t eat fast enough so you ate them yourself.\u00a0 Hey, they didn’t want them, did they?\u00a0 Your lucky numbers are the 18th through the 27th numbers in the Fibonacci sequence.<\/p>\n

\"SagittariusSagittarius (The Archer):\u00a0<\/em> You are an idealistic flame, waiting to light the fires of those around you.\u00a0 You’re mutable, you’re eclectic, and you’re going to bust a heel this week.\u00a0 Keep a spare pair of shoes in your desk Monday.<\/p>\n

\"Capricorn\"Capricorn (The Sea-Goat):\u00a0<\/em>\u00a0 That Italian cruise ship sank because of you.\u00a0 Chuck Norris weeps when he thinks about what you could have been.\u00a0 How do you sleep at night?\u00a0 Oh, and your mom will call on Sunday; don’t pick up the phone.\u00a0 You don’t want to know.<\/p>\n

\"Aquarius\"Aquarius (The Water Bearer):\u00a0<\/em>\u00a0Just as literature is news that stays news, you are as old now as you have ever been.\u00a0 By Wednesday, you’ll be even older.\u00a0 By this time next week, everything you know will have turned on its head and you’ll wonder why you ever wore your underpants on the inside.\u00a0 Roll with it.\u00a0 Your lucky number is nothing at all.\u00a0<\/p>\n

\"Pisces\"Pisces (The Fish):<\/em>\u00a0\u00a0You glory and delight in getting others to adore you, and why should you not?\u00a0 You are the Shogun of your office, the Karmic guide of your bus stop.\u00a0 You’re still going to have to clean the bird shit off the window on Tuesday.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Big Ugly Horoscope. Catch up with your own personal astro-illogical future for the weekend and next week – your daily dose of destiny under your sign.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[54],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2408"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2408"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2408\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2446,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2408\/revisions\/2446"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2408"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2408"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2408"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}