{"id":2019,"date":"2011-11-18T07:30:33","date_gmt":"2011-11-18T11:30:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/?p=2019"},"modified":"2011-11-18T08:05:53","modified_gmt":"2011-11-18T12:05:53","slug":"manfaq-friday-send-in-the-clowns","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/?p=2019","title":{"rendered":"ManFAQ Friday: Send in the Clowns!"},"content":{"rendered":"
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It’s Friday, and that means answer time! For those of you who have commented with questions from previous ManFAQs, thank you. I’m adding yours to the list of questions women have asked about men over the years, and I will answer them all in turn – to continue to demystify the more malodorous gender for those of the gentler.\u00a0 Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man. What could go wrong?<\/p>\n

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Question:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 Why do\u00a0boys try to be funny when they’re not?<\/em><\/p>\n

Answer:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0What do you mean, they’re not funny?\u00a0 Of course they’re funny!\u00a0 They’re standing there telling\u00a0you\u00a0jokes and\u00a0clowning around and jumping like – yeah, he’s pretty pathetic, isn’t he?\u00a0 The short answer is that he’s desperate.\u00a0 There are a couple of reasons here.<\/p>\n

KNOCK KNOCK!\u00a0 If he’s telling you reasonably clean jokes, doing pratfalls, and using obvious physical humor, he’s desperate for attention – even if only for someone to tell him to knock it the hell off.\u00a0 If you keep not laughing, he’ll\u00a0eventually knock himself senseless,\u00a0get tired of it, or kill him self trying.\u00a0 (“Hey ya’ll, watch this!”)<\/p>\n

THERE’S THIS CAT…\u00a0 If he’s telling you jokes about physics (“Sorry, we don’t serve faster than light particles here.”), he’s desperate to\u00a0relate to you.\u00a0 He wants to see if you’re on the same planet he is.\u00a0 If you keep not laughing, he’ll move on eventually.\u00a0 (“A neutrino walks into a bar!”)<\/p>\n

MORE BEAVER!\u00a0 If\u00a0he’s told you three ball jokes, two dick jokes,\u00a0the one about the maggots making love in dead earnest, and he’s trying hard to make\u00a0a pun about beavers, he’s desperate for some Hey Hey. \u00a0If you keep not laughing, he’ll move on eventually.\u00a0 (“Do you think I asked for a\u00a0twelve-inch pianist?”)<\/p>\n

I READ THAT ONE\u00a0– If he’s making literary jokes, anything with the words Hemmingway, Faulkner, or Baudelaire in the punchline, \u00a0he’s really<\/em> desperate for some Hey Hey.\u00a0 Don’t listen to a thing he says.\u00a0 Really.\u00a0 I don’t care what French restaurant he invites you to, don’t go.\u00a0 Baudelaire is never<\/strong> funny.\u00a0 (“Fleurs du Mal? That’s what SHE said!”)<\/p>\n

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Now you know. Please, feel free to comment! Also, forward any questions you’d<\/strong> like answered to BUMD – at – biguglymandoll.com!<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\u00a0<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Why do boys try to be funny when they’re not? Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man. What could go wrong?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[41],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2019"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2019"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2019\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2064,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2019\/revisions\/2064"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2019"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2019"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biguglymandoll.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2019"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}