It’s Friday, and that means answer time! For those of you who have commented with questions from previous ManFAQs, thank you. I’m adding yours to the list of questions women have asked about men over the years, and I will answer them all in turn – to continue to demystify the more malodorous gender for those of the gentler.\u00a0 Actual questions, posed by real women, and answered by a REAL man. What could go wrong?<\/p>\n
Question:<\/strong>\u00a0 Why do men like guns?\u00a0 ESPECIALLY naked women with guns?<\/em><\/p>\n Answer:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0You know, everyone said people wouldn’t go for peanut butter combined with chocolate too, but they were wrong.\u00a0\u00a0So let’s examine this.<\/p>\n Guns.\u00a0 Long hard barrel,\u00a0stuff comes out the end when you manipulate\u00a0it,\u00a0symbol of power, makes the weak\u00a0feel strong and the strong feel invincible.\u00a0 The holder feels a sense of satisfaction and pleasure when it shoots.\u00a0 Do you\u00a0need<\/strong> a better metaphor\u00a0for a penis?\u00a0 No?\u00a0 I didn’t think so either.<\/p>\n OK, what about Naked Women?\u00a0 Let’s\u00a0go back to the bit about stuff comes out the end when you manipulate\u00a0it, and leave it at that.\u00a0 Guys\u00a0love to see naked women, pretty much regardless of what they’re holding.\u00a0 Most men will tell you that naked women look just fine holding anything from an IRS tax invoice to a box of lightbulbs – they’re not really going to notice what she’s holding most of the time.<\/p>\n So, you take a woman with no clothes on and hand her a very powerful penis metaphor, and you’re probably going have his attention locked, cocked, and ready to go.\u00a0 He wants to see something shoot.\u00a0 If you asked him what kind of gun she was holding, he couldn’t do much better than “a big one.”\u00a0<\/p>\n Now, I’m all for nudity on all sides and while I’m not a gun fanatic, I do like to shoot them once in a while.\u00a0 However, I confess I was thinking that if a woman is butt nekkid and holding a piece, the only things being shot are the photos.\u00a0 I mean, ouch!\u00a0<\/p>\n But, in the interest of the complete objectivity for which I am known, I decided that I should do a little research into your question.\u00a0 I’m happy to report that Googling “tits and guns” only took me six\u00a0and half hours over two weeks – I wanted to make sure my research was thorough, you see.\u00a0 In the interest of prudent prurience, I will leave you with this 26-second video clip, which is very nearly almost safe for work, depending on where you work and as long as you keep the volume off.\u00a0 Notice, please the gradual buildup, the mounting tension, the unstoppable momentum, and the money shot at the end.\u00a0<\/p>\n